And Then She Became My Child

Until the week before she died, she was almost her normal self – absolute self-reliance, her domination over me and appa, and her nightly leg pains. But during the final week at home, her activities gradually slowed down.

In her last five days at home, she felt weak and couldn’t make coffee in the morning – something she had never outsourced to me and appa – and I made it for all of us. She wanted someone to wash her plates after she ate – something for which she always steadfastly refused help – and I did this for her.

In her last four days, she needed some support at times while going to the toilet because her legs were hurting while she walked, and I went with her.

In her last three days, she was becoming even weaker that she needed somebody to help drape her dress around her, and I helped her wear her dress.

Two days prior to her hospitalization, she wanted me to help her comb her hair as her hands were weak – I combed it for her.

The day before we took her to the hospital, she was feeling so sleepy she forgot to wipe her face and mouth after her food, something unusual given her paranoia for cleanliness – I wiped them for her.

The day we took her to the hospital, even though she was fully conscious, she could not walk the short distance from the door to the vehicle, so I (with help from my cousin) carried her.

She had become my child.

I had become my amma’s amma.

What fortune!

I was her child again <= And then she became my child => I was her doctor



144. When Your Parent Becomes Your Child: A Journey of Faith Through My Mother’s Dementia –; also see –


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Do you know that you can read specific chapters alone of Amma depending on who you are and what interests you? So, we have selected chapters that could be of interest to young, middle-aged and old men & women, to medical and white collar professionals, to those wishing to know specifically about heart problems, blood pressure or leg ailments, medical management of seniors & elders, and even those interested in reading some fun and humour.

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